Struggling...

...and I hate it.  And I hate talking about it.  Which is why I haven't been writing.  I did get in my two half hour training runs, which was good.  But thats really all I can say about this week that was good.  The rest of it - not so much.  Thats ALL the exercise I did.  I haven't logged my food consistently for a couple of weeks.  The reason - not eating right.  Eating pizza, nachos, and cookies and just other junk.  I've gained 5 lbs.  I'm back up to 210.  I know most of it is bloating, so I'm not worried that I really gained 5 lbs.

I just hate when I'm doing good, and am in a good place, something holds me back.  I don't know why.  I was at 93 lbs lost.  So close to being under 200 for the first time in 11 years, and close to losing 100 lbs. 

The only thing thats good, is I always come back to it.  I logged my food yesterday, went running, and just over all did better.  I was over my "weight loss" calories, but was under my "weight maintenance" calories, which was good. 

My run was HARD yesterday.  I did 2.5 miles in 29:54.  The time wasn't bad, but it was just physically hard for me. I felt like I couldn't breathe, my legs were sore.  My ankles and shins were tired.  I know it was because of the shoes I wore yesterday at work.  There was an old Grandma there walking - and when I came up behind her, she started running.  Well, there was NO way I was going to let this 70+ year old woman run faster than me - so lol, I pushed it a little harder, and got a head of her, and wouldn't let myself walk, because I didn't want to be passed by her ;) lol. 

Anyway.  I'm ending this month better than the past few weeks have been.  I plan on starting May off the right way.  I need to get in more exercise each week, other than my 2 weekly runs, and my long run on the weekends.  I want to get in a couple of bike rides, weather permitting.  I also really NEED to start doing some sort of strength training.  So I guess back to work out DVDs once or twice a week.  There is no excuse for me being this lazy.